Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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