If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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