this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
