Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
