This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
