It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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