I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
