Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
