We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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