I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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