normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
