We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
So much rum. So many feels.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize