don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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