i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
