Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
we're chasing vodka with high fives
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
