so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize