we have officially lost it.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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