I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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