Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
