I feel like abortions should bother me more
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
