I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
