hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Let's paint friendship bongs
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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