Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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