My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
