well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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