i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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