if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
did i just pee glitter
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
