So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
