Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
you would pick up someone in the library
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize
