im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
