people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
