I can tuck mytits in my pants
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
