Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize
