I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
