I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
