you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
