It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
