He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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