Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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