I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
