I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
