Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
