My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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