well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
please come you make the beer taste better
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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