oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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