So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
