Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
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