I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize