The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Randomize
