I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
