it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
